1. You have 4 sections in this book. DONOT read ahead.
The 1st section should be read BEFORE starters
The 2nd section should be read AFTER starters and BEFORE main course
The 3rd section should be read AFTER main course and BEFORE dessert
The 4th section should be read AFTER desserts
2. You should reveal EVERYTHING you read in this book, otherwise you are concealing evidence
3. At the end you should make a guess at who killed Lord Strutbury.
4. You are the murderer, so try hard not to give yourself away
5. Try to keep your booklet away from prying eyes.
TURN TO THE NEXT PAGE
You’re an infamous “it” girl. Ala Paris Hilton, you’re famous for being a Strutbury, and you’ve never had a job. You’ll turn up to the opening of an envelope and try and mingle with the stars. You’re a trend-setter, and are used to getting your face in the papers.
You’re not close to your family. Your Grandparents poked their nose into your business, and were constantly going on about your nasty drug habit and excessive spending.
Your grandfather (the deceased) was pompous and an interfering old fool that – before his untimely death, swore to you that he wouldn’t give you any more money.
You will act: Very arrogant, very fashion-foward, withdrawn as a result of drugs, fake
You will talk: Hipster, trendy, drop names of your celebrity friends.
Turn the page
You’ll put on an act to the others to try and make out you were so upset by your dear Grandfathers death. You were so so so so so close to him, how will you cope? Play it up, big time and then subtly ask how much he’s left you in his will.
Boast to the group of bore’s that you were in Heat magazine last week with famous stars drinking in the Ivy. A bit disappointing as you were in need of a facial at the time.
Your auntie Hilary is a total embarrassment to the family, but she is family so you better ask how she is. Is she still single? Is she still devoting her hours to cross stitch? While asking her this, look her up and down with amusement.
Do not turn the page
You are feeling quite “cold turkey”. You’re going to find it hard to breath sometimes, you’ll constantly sigh, throw yourself about, itch yourself, be jumpy and rub your nose.
You’ll snap at your grandmother if she mentions your celebrity status as if it was something to be ashamed of. But then suddenly come out with a false laugh to convince the group you’re joking. And ask how much was left to you and Seb in the will.
That Charlie is a weirdo! He seems to fancy your Grandma. You’ll act quite freaked out when he talks to you. If he touches you, flip out and say, “ewwwww!!”
You’re going to get very cross when you find out which busy body showed your Grandma the pictures of you in OK magazine.
Do not turn the page
You’re desperate now, try whispering to cousin Seb across the group does he have any “Charlie” to spare.
Be quite insistent now. Ask how much you’re Granddad left you in his will. Really suck up to your Grandma as you ask her this. If the amount is high you’ll be unable to hide your joy, if it is under 100K you’ll be hysterical with tears.
You have found a pill in your bag. (better than nothing) Take it and tell everyone you’re having an aspirin as all these sill conversations are giving you a headache.
Do not turn the page
That weirdo Charlie is going to make an awful announcement that will have you so shocked and upset, you’ll be half crying half gagging.
Snatch away Charlie’s pipe and desperately take some drags while muttering that you’re “bloody well screwed”.
Ask Lady Strutbury if she’ll lend you 50 thou, (thousand). You can’t believe how evil you’re Grandad was dying and not leaving you a penny. May he rot in hell.
Start chewing, licking your lips, and dancing.
WHO MURDERED LORD STRUTBURY?
YOU’LL SAY YOU THINK IT WAS THE COOK, TIMOTHY
You’ll explain to the group that Lord Strutbury wasn’t a nice man. He put you down and disapproved of your lifestyle most people would kill for. He was rolling around in money and he wouldn’t even lend you a measly 50 thousand pounds.
Being an “it” girl is hard work, all those late champagne nights and early morning facial appointments. You needed drugs to keep you going.
You only needed 50 thou, why was your Grandfather such a pig to you. You lost your temper and gave him a push. You didn’t mean to kill him, and started to dial 911, but the thought of the will stopped you.
C’est la vie